Someone ought to find out what time is made of and get a patent on the stuff. Think of the possibilities!

Have you ever had to hire someone to work for you? It’s an awful business! Here come the halt and the hopeful, resumes crumpled, palms sweaty, serving time on the death-row-of-the-unemployed. Most of these people will surely not be chosen for rescue, at least not here and not today.

An acquaintance confided in me that she rolls down her car window when she sees folks hanging out at the corner. “Get a job and a haircut!” she yells, and speeds off. It’s a cowardly way to express her annoyance, I admit.

The image shows up in countless love songs and stories. It’s a symbol of hope against hope, and heartache that hasn’t yet become heartbreak. The porch light left on, long after midnight, tells us that someone’s missing and someone’s waiting.

For most of us, the moment comes when we are barely into our teens. Suddenly the grown-ups—who, up to now, have been omnipotent—are revealed to be what they are: mere mortals like the man behind the curtain in The Wizard of Oz.

Everybody who goes to church knows the basic rules of Christian living. Of course, often as not, they default to the Hebrew code when asked to describe them, but that’s another issue entirely. At least they’re in the right ballpark—the Bible—and not offering up civil law.

Who’s your worst enemy? Not knowing a single thing about your life, I can make a pretty good guess. It’s not your boss, your mate, your rival, or that fifth-grade teacher who always had it in for you. No, our own worst enemy is usually ourselves.

Let’s have a show of hands here: Who likes to eat? If you’re sitting next to someone who didn’t raise a hand, check their pulse! Eating is not just another physiological function we’re obliged to perform, like blinking or swallowing or sleeping (or going to the bathroom). Eating is a cheerful obligation, a happy necessity.

How many love songs does the world need? If you can come up with a number, then maybe you’ve never been in love. The great songwriting duo John Lennon and Paul McCartney had an argument over this equation.

Native american writer Sherman Alexie wrote a compelling book of short stories arguing against the absurdity of racial stereotypes: The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven. The title suggests irreconcilable forces that carry their grievances all the way to eternity.